Showing posts with label Abuja. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Abuja. Show all posts

Friday, 26 February 2016

NECTAR

Nectar, I'll be your bee.
Humming all over you on a knee
Let the flower open up, deep
Till you let me suckle with glee

Monday, 28 September 2015

Abuja (12)

Abuja, of a flood's nightly welcome
Fires up fantasies and washes away sorrows
Though cries of men and of babies spring forth thence

Friday, 3 July 2015

SULE (2)

You see, I have the most amazing gateman, Sule. He's quite good at what he says. He sweeps the compound and leaves the gathered rubbish for the wind to scatter, so he can sweep them again the next morning. He leaves the water pump on, so that when the tanks are filled, the interlocked tiles of a garden we have gets watered. Oh, and he doesn't open the gate simply because you honk your horn or tap at the gigantic gate, no. You've got to call him up or even ping him as I recently discovered.
So, recently, I was frying tomato for sauce. I was having some hallowed guest over. Everything else was set except the sauce, and this guest will be arriving in 30 minutes. In fact, I'd been told they were on their way. While stir-frying the tomato paste and adding condiments and extra spices, I noticed I had ran out of seasoning. The Royco and Maggi combination was finished. So, I pinged Sule.
Me: Ping! Ping!!
Sule: Oga, yaya dai? Inzo ne? (Oga, I should come?)
Me: E, ka zo ka taya ni da wani abu (yeah, come and help me with something)
Sule struts at will, and knocks on my door. I quickly open up, and beg him to help me get a pack of Royco from the container shop down hill. I lay emphasis on 'quick please', handing him N500 note.
That was when my woes began. A supposed 5 minutes walk down and back up the small hill, became a 45 minutes wait for Sule. I'd gone ahead to fry and even simmer the sauce without seasoning. Then a knock on my door.
Sule: Oga, gashi an samo da kyar. Shago uku na zagaya kafin aka samu (Oga, finally. I had to check at three shops)
Then he hands me a big sized bottle of Hypo and N250 change...

Sunday, 28 June 2015

Sule (1)

I uncharacteristically woke late today. This means I missed church. So, I set about cleaning the house, doing the dishes, preparing lunch and if there's extra strength, do some laundry. It was while I was doing the dishes that I heard it. Loud sobs. Really serious crying. It was my delectable neighbor. I don't even know her name (that is reserved for some evening of better acquaintance).but she was sobbing loudly. I paused and worry ran through my spine.
I dropped the plate I was washing, cleansed my hands and (like all nice neighbors will) dashed for her door. I tapped gently a couple of times, and the sob stopped.
"Who's there? Sule (thinking it was the gateman)"
"It's m...me...e. It's Ken" I managed to say, in a troubled (had to make her realise her crying bothered me) way.
After a run of tap and a couple of steps, she turned the keys and flushed the porch with her resplendence (with red eyes).
"Madam (until I get her name), I heard you sob and I REALLY want to know why you're crying" I said.
"Nothing, I'm fine" she replied.
"I'm not sure, because your sobs were loud enough for anyone to know you're not fine", I interjected.
Then she opened up... "Can you imagine? I'm watching the third of Cinderella trilogy, but it's not Cinderella, it's a boy named Quagliarella. It's not the glass stiletto as we've known it, but a pair of Levi jeans. The banquet with the prince is about to start, but Quagliarella can't find that magical pair of Levi jeans."
I sighed!
She said she had earlier watched the latest in the Shrek series, and Fiona was gone. Instead, there was a beardy dude of lithe frame called Frodo. She couldn't understand what was going on with movies anymore, and let out a shriek of a sob.
That was when I woke up, and heard the wail. Checked the time... 11:23am. I got off my bed, and dashed for the door. I have to find out why my neighbor is crying this morning.

Monday, 16 March 2015

WILL #GEJ WIN IT?


The political sphere in Nigeria remains charged, leading up to apparently, the most expensive heated elections in the history of the nation. Most analysts would say prior to the postponement of February 14, the All Peoples' Congress was charging to the finish line like Usain Bolt. But the shift in the checkered line, has helped the Peoples' Democratic Party, regain some stamina, and giving a push to the line.

To this end, a group of young party loyalists, aligned to the incumbent, President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan, a.k.a. #GEJ decided to put together an event, to tell party stalwarts why GEJ wins it. According to them, the President's achievements are under reported, so Nigerians don't know on what premise they are lobbied to return #GEJ for a second term by constitutional right

So, even though the organizers screamed and shouted that the event was a formal one, and there shouldn’t be jeans and sneakers, trust Nigerians now… Anyways, I called up a darling friend, and she was my date for the evening. They were economical with time, as they indeed said the event will go live by 6pm, and at around 6pm, they were set. See ehn, I was VERY impressed by the set up. From the stage, to the seating, to managing the movement of cameramen, to the speakers, sound, montage… See, they bettered the PlayForum guys a bit. I can beat my chest anywhere and say Naija Boyz can “did it”. At the heart of the technical setup was the “kekere ekun”, Segun Awosanya a.k.a. Segalink. Even though he had a resplendent seat in front, and he was dapper as always, he was ducking from the view of the cameras, darting across the entire space, and ensuring the whole thing thick.
In my mind of minds, I saw the name of the convener as “Karo”, and thought of only one twitter handle I know with that name - @karo_orovboni, and I went burst with it, as the convener delivered his welcome address. But indeed, it was @karoagono. Thankfully, I was promptly corrected, and the barrage of questions in my mentions stopped.


Mr. Agono insisted in his welcome speech, that you may differ in ideas with him (irrespective of what part of the country you live in), yet to him, you remain brothers and sisters I wonder if this holds sway across board though


And in the next 5 minutes, Karo adulated GEK in bard-like rendition, citing why to him already, “GEJ wins it”. Above all, he reiterated his angst on being told by friends in the opposition, that he had indeed taken money, to give his support to #GEJ (Countfreemont’s tweet). Again, he said you Yes, you have told him that if you support the opposition, you’re intelligent and cool, but if you support the government, you are intellectually deficient.

Sen. Anyim Pius Anyim then proceeded with the first keynote, and dropped a couple of subs for the 1st family, the opposition candidate – Gen. Muhammadu Buhari and a host of others. His first sub though, was for Mama Peshe. Because only a few days back in Akwa Ibom and then in Edo, she said it was constitutionally a right for her husband to get 8 years in office. Oga Anyim said instead, that #GEJ was not even concerned about being reelected… Itumo 



Again, he delivered a master of subs, when he proclaimed that #GEJ’s is the first administration where power is not concentrated at the centre, in reference to statements by one agile retiree, that there are indeed 5 Presidents ruling the country (sic). According to Senator Anyim, “Mr. President has no need to keep all the power, he’ll rather strengthen the relevant institutions”. He also said that #GEJ’s administration has guaranteed the stability of the national legislature, and it is not as volatile. Well, maybe Senator Anyim was asleep when recently, there was rancor at the national assembly


He also went on about the rebasing of the economy, and said it wasn’t really for bragado projecting Nigeria as the largest economy on the continent, but for it to capture the relevant sectors of the economy which were hitherto neglected, for the sake of national economic planning for the future. Again, he delivered a sub, this time to the party itself, when he said, “We are not working for reelection, but for the next generation”.


After his speech, an army of young, intelligent and daft Nigerians took to the podium, to espouse the achievements of this administration, from corruption *swallows flagyl for my running stomach* to SURE-P, 10 million increase in school enrolments even though UNICEF says Nigeria has about 11 million out of school children and even the small matter of the number of Nigerians – 44 million plus – now using the internet thanks to this administration. 


















Anyways, I was dazzled most by the speech of Toyosi Akerele (@toyosirise), and no wonder everyone else was – she’s a Jossite, like Mike Omeri and Labaran Maku *covers face* and myself. She touched me, when she hammered on the truth, that even though young Nigerians are now taking the handouts because if we don’t, the old generation will still pocket it, or dash oyinbo PR firms, we can now negotiate on our terms, because we are trailblazing across the globe, making Nigeria proud, even more than the government is (yet another sub).











With all the adulation coming in, Eghes Eyienyien gave a strong speech, thrumping up the achievements of #GEJ, but ended it all with a massive sub:

The evening petered in to one of adulation and reiteration of the same facts and figures of achievements we have seen on twitter, facebook, on television and even on newspapers. And then, the lie called Bala Mohammed happened. He claimed that there have been massive road expansions in his administration, with plans to develop new districts in the FCT, via public-private partnerships. 


Oga, didn’t mention that his administration like those before him, have neglected the development of Idu/Karimo Industrial District, which will have been the nerve center for small businesses and industries living in the FCT. For him, developing primed areas in “our own Dubai”, were key projects for his administration. And I dare to add, even the illegal conversion of about 20ha of designated green areas in Asokoro to residential quarters, without adhering to requirements of the Abuja master plan, is a part of it. Oga Minister also mentioned that they were working birthing a tax body for the FCT, to generate N300bn in revenue for the Territory, so that it can exempt itself from the national budget and be self-sufficient.


Wont for time, the compere took a couple of questions from online viewers and from the audience, with most of them focusing on the issue of power. Venerable Professor Chidenu Nebo reiterated that the power sector doesn’t work akin to “plug n’ play”. It takes time to run feasibility and evaluation studies, make procurements, import and install, but promised that power will be a demon of the past soon, especially if #GEJ is reelected. Oh, and he said, “#GEJ has overworked and over performed, but under appreciated”. 


 As the evening grew older, the speakers and the audience had the look on their faces that said one thing – “#GEJ will win it”. 



The event came to a prompt conclusion with the national pledge: I pledge to Nigeria my country, to be faith, loyal and HONEST; to serve Nigeria with ALL my HEART, to DEFEND her UNITY and uphold her HONOR and GLORY; so help me God.

Friday, 6 March 2015

WHERE'S THE GOOD LIFE?



What is better than the good life? Why do parents ask their children and wards to study hard, get good grades, and good jobs? Why do businessmen ‘hustle’ hard? Why was the United Nations formed? Why did Karrueche ‘Caro Uche’ Tran break up with Chris Brown? Well, argue with your data plan, but everything revolves around the good life. Even the growth of economies, and the running of governments, and the activities of the United Nations and the thousands of non-profits. And then the big matter of elections…

Depending on how you see it, the Independent National Electoral Commission, Nigeria’s federal firm charged with the conduct and regulations of elections, sought a good life for the polity, and that was why she deemed it fit to shift #NigeriaDecides from #feBuhari to #March4Nigeria. Trust me, it doesn’t matter which politician’s plans have been scrambled or enhanced with this change, the end game is that #WeTriumphStill, from this grueling ordeal as a nation.

However, I am told that since the election campaigns of 1954, the promises have been the provision of basic amenities like water, power, roads, hospitals, etc. Fast forward 61 years after, and the promises are the same. Worse, is the state of the power sector in the country, which has cranked up the cost of doing business; created a generator imports cabal; and a government which is yet to fathom how to upgrade the transmission infrastructure seamlessly. But can I blame them? The issues dates back to the era of the famed National Electric Power Authority, NEPA.

Young Nigerians are looking for jobs, careers, human security, justice in their lives, peace, and the good life…I am one of them. But we are tired of waiting for the opportunities, we are tired of waiting for power, and good roads, and better wages and salaries, hospitals, even light. This was what Deji Arosho a movie director and producer captured ahead of the 2015 elections, in the musical movie, “The Good Life”. In 30 minutes, featuring such star artistes like DJ Switch (Glo X Factor Winner 2013), Six Foot Plus (Jos bred popular artiste) Shaffy Bello-Akinrimisi (Award Winning Nollywood Actress) amongst other cast, Deji weaves the story of renewable solutions with elections, and seeks a common ground where everything might just lead to the good life, when politicians adopt issue-based campaigning, and talk about power. 


The movie, sponsored by the Heinrich Boell Stiftung Nigeria, buttresses the #PowerIsPower campaign by the same foundation, which has been drumming up civil society, to advocate for the inclusion of renewable energy as a power solution in the campaign manifesto of politicians at local, state and national levels. While Nigeria needs about 200,000 MW of power to feed her hungry population's demands, current output is pegged at 4,400 MW. This means that most of 170 million people are either spending a lot on hydro carbon powered generators or utilise kerosene powered lanterns, which remains hazardous to health.
Operating in Nigeria from Lagos since 1994, and then from Abuja in 2009, Heinrich Boell Stiftung Nigeria runs programs on sustainability, women’s rights and good governance. She supports activities that aim to identify greener development options, which would include growth models that promote responsible use of natural resources in times of increasing climate stress; but overall are gender sensitive and socially inclusive.